everything has changed. and i don't know what aspect of change to try to absorb first. the culture shock is slowly ebbing away and i'm left with reality. but reality for me has changed.
i knew i had to leave some burdens behind in india. but what did happen surpassed everything i ever imagined. india stripped away all the hardness and left me heart-breakingly, delicately raw.
adjusting to life in L.A. again is taking its natural course. but i don't know if i can go back to living as i had before. i know we are incredibly adaptable creatures. so in time, i'll stop waking up at 4:00 am. the disorientation will end. the resentment towards my own indulgent culture will turn into a greater understanding. the longing will start to subside...
but the fact remains: i've changed. and i now have to re-think everything. and re-know what i think. and re-decide what i want my life to be.