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7.08.2002 | link |

 

what is it about this summer that has everyone buzzing? it's been so hectic and unsummery. one thing after another. and whenever i think guiltily about poor neglected blog, there’s no inspiration to be found anywhere. i hate this feeling. despite all activity, i feel bored. and boring.

picasso said "inspiration exists, but it has to find you working." so although 4th of july was like, ages ago, and all good little bloggers got their holiday entries in by noon on saturday (at the latest), i thought i’d work on a top-5-things-i-learned-this-4th-of-july list. maybe you can learn from them, too. better late than never. i think.

1. sleeping in on 4th of july is good. but not when you can experience the american delight that is the sierra madre 4th of july parade—complete with shriners driving tiny cars, ponytailed pep squadders, folksy off-key singers in the back of pick-up trucks, and of course, fire engines. so lesson #1: sometimes you have to get out of bed, have a couple of mimosas, and watch life pass you by the right way.

2. no 4th of july is complete without a visit to the shopping mall food court. preferably in the suburbs. preferably wearing flip-flops. where else can you have a hot-dog-on-a-stick with such a cross section of your fellow americans?

3. that sad, misguided hasbro employee who thought "ebay: the electronic talking auction game" would be a smash hit among the over 10-year-old age group is going to face some bitter disappointment and perhaps be given the boot, as it is currently 70% off in the game spot at the mall. (ok, that's not really a lesson. but i thought it was funny.)

4. you love your mother. but never, ever let her guilt you into going to a family bbq in your uncle’s back yard. where you find out you're the only person there under 40 because all your siblings figured out how not to be suckered into this last minute arrangement. and even your little cousins are smart enough to stay in their bedrooms. so sometime between the obligatory fruit-salad-eating and an idiotic political debate, you will inevitably realize that independence day has turned into codependence day. and there isn’t even any beer.

5. this final lesson applies no matter how sober you think you are. when you see a bag of "beef chunks" (the real-life human snack food) hanging next to the red licorice in the malibu chevron minimart--just keep walking sister. just keep walking.


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